FORTY REASONS WHY DOGS ARE BETTER THAN WOMEN

1. DOGS DON'T CRY
2. DOGS LOVE IT WHEN YOUR FRIENDS COME OVER
3. DOGS DON'T CARE IF YOU USE THIER SHAMPOO
4  DOGS THINK YOU SING GREAT
5  A DOG'S TIME IN THE BATHROOM IS CONFINED TO A QUICK DRINK
6  DOGS DON'T EXPECT YOU TO CALL, EVEN WHEN YOU ARE LATE
7  THE LATER YOU ARE, THE MORE EXCITED DOGS ARE TO SEE YOU
8  DOGS WILL FORGIVE YOU FOR PLAYING WITH OTHER DOGS
9  DOGS DON'T NOTICE WHEN YOU CALL THEM BY ANOTHER DOG'S NAME
10 DOGS ARE EXCITED BY ROUGH PLAY
11 DOGS DON'T MIND IF YOU GIVE THEIR OFFSPRING AWAY
12 DOGS UNDERSTAND THAT FARTS ARE FUNNY
13 DOGS CAN REALLY APPRECIATE BODY HAIR
14 EVEN FAT, UGLY GUYS CAN GET A BEAUTIFUL, LOVING DOG
15 IF A DOG IS GORGEOUS, OTHER DOGS DON'T HATE IT
16 FEMALE DOGS DON'T MIND IF YOU CALL THEM THE "B" WORD
17 DOGS DON'T SHOP
18 DOGS LIKE IT WHEN YOU LEAVE LOTS OF THINGS ON THE FLOOR
19 A DOG'S DISPOSITION STAYS THE SAME ALL MONTH LONG
20 DOGS NEVER NEED TO EXAMINE THE RELATIONSHIP
21 A DOG'S PARENTS NEVER VISIT
22 DOGS LOVE LONG CAR TRIPS
23 DOGS UNDERSTAND THAT INSTINCTS ARE BETTER THAN ASKING FOR 
DIRECTIONS
24 WHEN A DOG GETS OLD AND SNAPS AT YOU INCESSANTLY, YOU CAN SHOOT IT.
25 DOGS LIKE BEER
26 DOGS DON'T HATE THEIR BODIES
27 NO DOG EVER PUT ON 100 POUNDS AFTER REACHING ADULTHOOD
28 DOGS NEVER CRITICIZE
29 DOGS AGREE THAT YOU HAVE TO RAISE YOUR VOICE TO GET YOUR POINT 
ACROSS
30 DOGS NEVER EXPECT GIFTS
31 DOGS DON'T WORRY ABOUT GERMS
32 DOGS DON'T WANT TO KNOW ABOUT EVERY OTHER DOG YOU EVER HAD
33 DOGS DON'T LET MAGAZINE ARTICLES GUIDE THEIR LIVES
34 YOU NEVER HAVE TO WAIT ON A DOG, AS THEY ARE READY TO GO 24 HOURS A 
DAY
35 DOGS HAVE NO USE FOR FLOWERS, CARDS, OR JEWELRY
36 DOGS NEVER BORROW YOUR SHIRTS
37 DOGS ENJOY HEAVY PETTING IN PUBLIC
38 DOGS FIND YOU AMUSING WHEN YOU'RE DRUNK
39 DOGS CAN'T TALK
40 DOGS SELDOM OUTLIVE YOU